My best friend is a total Badass. Like, Badass Queen of the Universe. Badass Squared, times Infiniti.
Yesterday, over the course of more than six hours and without an epidural to dull the pain, Beth pushed and breathed and pushed some more. And at 2:38 p.m., she pushed one last time and brought into the world handsome little Evan Elwell, 7 pounds 7 ounces and 20 inches long.
The doctor induced her labor early Thursday morning, more than a week early, for a few reasons. I'm a worrier who hates being four hours away from my best friend. So I slept fitfully Wednesday night, woke up early as usual Thursday and decided that if she was about to spend several hours in intense, scream-like-you're-being-tortured pain, I could put myself through some self-induced pain.
It was my lame but well-intentioned way of commiserating from afar! But it also got me thinking about pain and soreness and fitness, and the amazing feats our bodies are capable of accomplishing. It got me thinking about the Badass within each of us, the inner "athlete" waiting to be unleashed.
Consider the Tour de France cyclists, who are about to enter yet another weekend of steep mountains. For 21 days, they cycle for several hours up and down amazing flat roads and beautiful mountains - racing to be first, no matter how much their quads are screaming. They cycle all day, go to sleep, and wake up to do it all again. For THREE weeks.
When I lead my RealRyder classes through steep climbs and one- and two-hour classes, I often remind them of this feat. "If they can cycle for eight hours today," I tell them, "we can cycle for an hour." And the thing is, we really CAN.
Soreness and pain (not injury pain, but push-your-muscles-pain) are relative, and they're temporary. A little bit of both is necessary to get stronger, fitter, and more Badass. Just like a little bit - or a lot - of pain is necessary to bring a baby into the world, it's necessary to push through the burn to birth your inner Badass.
So try this cycling and weight training workout, and remember: No matter how much it burns, it's not cycling through the Alps for eight hours. And it's not birthing a 7-pound baby without an epidural!
Shannon's Ode-to-Pain
1. Bamboleo, Gypsy Kings, 3:23: Warmup in the saddle. Light tension. Stay loose and relaxed on tops. Find your groove on the bike.
2. Jump, Madonna, 3:59: Continue warmup. Add a slight amount of tension, enough to come up out of the saddle into a standing run. Up for 30 seconds, seated for 30 seconds. Repeat for the entire song, keeping a steady quick pace.
3. La Grange, ZZ Top, 3:52: Begin the first climb with rolling rolls in the saddle. Add a turn or two until you're at a 5 on a scale of 1 to 10 tension. That's your base. After 20 seconds, add a full turn and keep pumping, trying to maintain the same pace through the tension for 20 seconds. Take off what you just added, cycle for 20 seconds, then add back that full turn. Repeat the pattern for the whole song, ending at the base tension of 5.
4. Vertigo, U2, 3:15: Keep climbing! Add one full turn. This is your base. From here, add a half turn every 30 seconds for the duration of the song. Extra challenge: Add speed, through the heavy tension, during the chorus. Quad burn...
5. Morning After Dark, Timbaland, 4:53: Jumps from seated to standing climb with moderate tension. Add tension back until you find a 5 or 6 on a scale of 1 to 10. The pattern is 16-second counts in the saddle with the tension, and then move into a standing climb position. So count 16 seconds, then walk your hands out to the end of the handlebars and let the rest of you follow until you're climbing out of the saddle. Your nose should be right at the middle of the handlebars, not out beyond them. Butt is back over the wide part of the saddle. Stay here for 16 seconds, then sit back down for 16 seconds. Then standing climb for 16 seconds. Go for the whole song, resting when you need to. Extra challenge: Speed up some of the jumps to 8-counts and 4-counts.
6. Breathe Me, Sia, 4:37: Back uphill for a long climb! From where you were in song 6, add a half turn. Every 20 seconds, bump the tension up slightly, for a total of 10 turns. It will get very heavy. Push through, being careful to take care of your knees. Come back down the same way, bumping the tension back slightly every 20 seconds for a total of 10 times. Stay here through the end of the song.
7. Shut it Down, Pitbull, 3:46: Back to a flat road for 1 minute. Flush the legs out. At minute 2, add a bit of tension back and go into a standing run for 30 seconds. Go back to the saddle for 30 seconds, then back into a standing run. Keep it up for the whole song.
8. Imma Be, Black Eyed Peas, 4:17: One more push up! Add back tension until you find an 8 on a scale of 1 to 10. Keep climbing until about 2 1/2 minutes in when the song pace picks up. At that point, go back to a flat road and speed it up at a race pace to the finish line. Hang onto that pace through the end. You've come too far to give up now!
9. My Way, Los Lonely Boys, 4:26: Cool it down with a victory lap! Find a flat road and just keep pedaling, flushing your legs out. Take deep breaths as your heart rate comes down. Hop off the bike, it's time for strength work!
Now get out there and enjoy the weekend! I have some baby shopping to do!